The Elephant Song

Photo of the elephant that lives on the mantel piece in my living room

This is a silly little song I wrote in March 2012 - the first song I've ever written in fact. I came to me one day while I was contemplating the phrase 'the elephant in the room' - I started thinking about where else the elephant might be and what she might be doing. I composed some verses about the elephant, then added in the other bits to make it into a story. This was originally a poem, but later became a song.

I sang it for first time in public at Poetica, an evening of poetry and music that used to take place every month in Bangor. Just before I started singing a member of the audience who was rather drunk started whistling and shouting. The host asked him to calm down and be quiet, then I started singing. He was the elephant and my song helped difuse the tension in the room.

The Elephant Song

There's a matter we must discuss
But I don't want to make a fuss
It's an issue we must address
But I don't want to cause any stress.

There's an elephant in the room
You've noticed, I assume
She's rather large and grey
And getting in the way.

It's so obvious to me
Oh why you can't see
We need to sort this out
And there's no need to pout!

Now the elephant's in the hall
Painting pictures on the wall
Of dragons and ships and trees
And great big bumblebees.

We must find a way
We can't let her stay
I'll go and call the zoo
To see what they can do

Now the elephant's on the stairs
Playing scrabble with the bears
Who live under chairs
And like to wear blue flares.

The zoo say they can give her
A nice place to stay
And we can go and see her
And we never have to pay.

Now the elephant's in the zoo
Making friends with the kangaroos
And delighting all the kids
By juggling dustbin lids.

Here's a recording:

Here's a PDF of the words for this song with chords. I usually play it on the ukulele, but it should work on other instruments.

There's plenty of scope for adding verses and playing with the words - feel free to have fun with it.

I've also made a video featuring a silly little conversation about elephants in rooms:

This video, and other videos I've made, are also available on my YouTube channel.

Songs I've written

The Elephant Song | When you get to jiggit | Chaos | Winter | Everyday adventures | Hints of Blossom | A Panda in a Poncho | Plinkin Plookplooks | Spollagyn son tey | How Many Roads? | A Gnu in My Shoe | A Hen in My Hat | The Ballad of the Wug and the Cra | La Plume de ma Tante | Ukuleles On The Shore | Echoes on the Tongue | Dardledumdue | It's Okay To Be Odd | Monday Morning | Tall Tales | Sail Across The Sky | Two Left Feet | Thunder River | Ning | Lazybones | Goats | The Toaster Song | Hello Hi Hey | Thingamajig | Jolly Yuletide | The Pliffploff | Bubbles | Distraction | Little Lions | The Little Green Owl | Pannas Owen | Seize The Day | Music in the Air | Pocket Hedgehogs | Dust | Lillilu | Lost in a Good Book | Quiet Please | Ffaldiral | Melting 😅 | That's When We'll Do That Thing | As Easy As | What Did I Come In Here For? | Upside Down | Thoir An Aire! | Ho Ha Hey | Patience | Time | Farewell | Stuff and Nonsense | Ruith Air Falbh / Run Away! | The Other Side | Colourless Green Ideas | Noodling | Off To Sea

Other songs


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